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Alcoholic Workshop Notes

Peaks-Valleys: Effects on the Family1-2

Effects of the dys-funtional family. We went through the peaks and the valleys, which is the pattern of control. Even if the person is a dry alcoholic this can continue....

alcoholic-control Effects on the Family

Drinking episodes
fairly infrequent

ATTEMPTS TO DENY THE PROBLEM
Shame feelings of embellishment humiliation

Discussion of drinking episode Discussion of drinking episode

Promises

making up   Making up ideal role playing
Ideal Role Playing                                                                        false hope
Recurrent drinking                                                 disappointment, hurt, confusion
                                    advice seeking from relatives, friends
                                     trial and error

Attempts to Eliminate the Problem
                           Social isolation
                           loss of perspective
                          drinking becomes focus of anxiety
                        drinking blamed for all problems
                        feelings they are "different"
                      attempts to cover up
Resentments                Resentments

Lack of Communication Lack of Communication
Loss of self worth, feelings of failure

Periods of Sobriety guilt, false hope temporary gains
self worth periods of euphoria

Recurrent drinking       efforts to control, obsession with drinking                        concentrate on short term goals
                          attempts to make an allusion to a happy home
                          self pity    protection of children
                        dependance on children for emotional support
                        anger and anxiety
Pleasant interactions
with children              Jealousy of children's affection for alcoholic
                             Attempts to involve children in trying to control alcoholic

                        Loss of Creativeness

Disorganization

Non drinking periods hopelessness skepticism tension

Recurrent drinkng nagging and silent treatment

children confused in loyalties -confused - terrified

Inconsistent Behavior behavior patterns in children

violence, relief and shame

Unreasonable demands unreasonable behavior, fear of insanity

avoidance of sex

Loss of job-violence

Outside Help Sought
guilt-loss of self respect-chaos, fear

inability to make decisions and follow through

Part 3 Attempts of reorganzie in spite of problems (sound familiar yet ;-/)

Developed by Louise Mehrman 1975 Amityville, New york for South Oaks Hospital

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